Tuesday, April 7, 2015

No Leanin'

A while ago I asked my friends on Facebook to give me a go to scripture. I was weary, burdened, my heart hurt and my emotions were so very low. Over 25 friends took time to respond and in no particular order I am meditating on the scriptures that they shared and also praying for them at the same time. 

So first will you join me and pray for my friend Debbie . Lord  we lift Debbie and her sweet family up to you. I ask that you keep them safe and that their life be filled with love and laughter. I praise you for Debbie hearing that small still voice and offering me a Word from our  Lord in my time of need.  I thank you for her faithfulness and prayers. Amen.

 OK, so Debbie suggested Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight. Proverbs 3:5-6.

understanding: comprehension. knowledge. discernment. judgement

acknowledge: confess, recognize and answer. express thanks for . to state that one has received a gift or favor.

path: a track or way worn by footsteps. a line of movement . course taken. a course for manner of conduct or procedure.

Although I was weary and despondent I never let go that God was working in my life. I needed to continue to comprehend God's grace, love and provision for me in that hard time. This was a time of calling on the knowledge that the Lord is always near and available. Praying for wisdom and the discernment BUT also the ability to discern when to Stop striving and LET GO and LET GOD. My judgement at that time was not top notch. So I sat, cried and rested in the Lord.

All the while I had to confess to God that I did not think that He was doing me right. I felt slighted with the loss of my Dad, the miscarriage of yet another baby within a one year time period and the disruption of our adoption. But I recognized that God was doing things in His time. ON HIS path. Not the way I wanted to go...clearly in the wrong direction....

I forced myself to answer Him in prayers of thanks for all the blessings I do have and continue to get each day. I needed to express my thanks for the gifts and favors he releases to me time and time again. I'm forever grateful for the Bible and the guidance it provides.

I also can recognize that my conduct directly relates to how fast I can get back on track with God. At that time in my life I was barely doing Bible Study. My prayers were selfish and all me me me! It was hard to change that habit that reminded me so much of the "old" Tracy that existed before I dedicated my life to the Lord. I was barely getting out of bed and in a very dark place. I am happy to report that the light is on. Tracy is home. And no. life is NOT perfect. Mostly my life is blessy (blessed and messy)

so my takeaway from this little blog is more trustin' less leanin' :)

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