I do quite often and it's usually by complete surprise. God can be a Ninja of sorts when it comes to dealing with little old me.
Here's what happened:
Last week a struggle that I thought was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay behind me came up and hit me square on....you know the kind. You have all these great plans and then whammo life happens.
Well this person is very near and dear to my heart and forgiveness has been an issue for oh...let's say my lifetime. 2 years ago I totally forgave this person. I worked really hard in a program called Living Waters offered by my church and we had nearly complete restoration in that relationship. (or so I thought)
Well then this person faultered a bit. This person is a human just like me. They made a mistake. They are lonely, they are sick, they are tired...they tripped and fell. But you know what. They got up and promised not to "fall" again. And what did I do? What did I say to this person that I had supposedly given forgiveness to and moved on?
I played chutes and ladders...yep. went right back to start. duh.
old habits die hard and the Lord just sat there shakin his head. I am sure He said "oh look at Tracy ...lettin' her Pride drag her around like a puppet."
So after giving this "forgiven" person the proper tongue lashing...off to church I went. Isn't that what all good Christians do? can I get an AMEN.
and then the Bible Slappin' started. uh huh...Bible slappin is this: no real Bible's are involved. But when the scripture hits you so hard that you get whiplash...or the worship songs stir you so much you want to lay on the ground and sob...well that is Bible Slappin' in my book . Some may say the Holy Spirit is moving in you. I agree.
So there I was in Church not thinking one iota about THAT person and worship began. Bible Slappin began. TEARS began. And Jesus loving all over me began. My friend behind me reached out and rubbed my back...evoking more tears. Thank God for old Mcdonald's napkins tucked into the deep recesses of purses!
The tears eventually stopped but I was left holding a brown bag of all the things God Told ME.
- What are you doing FOR this person? (uh. nothing but calling once a week)
- you need to go visit this person. (snap. )
- you need prayer and to pray MORE for this person
- This person needs to live closer to you, so you can love on them better
Did I mention that the person that I am speaking about is my Dad.
Yes. and when I read over this blog I see a calloused Christian typing. Looking in the mirror is hard. I had healthy boundaries in place so my Earthly father could not injure me anymore with his alcholism. But fences move, markers move, boundaries move people. The Lord is growing me "big and strong" and the more I grow the safer it is to open gates. Or repair fences.
So pray for me friends. My mear (sp?) mention of this and being in agreement with Christ on this matter has rewarded my family greatly this week. We were chosen to meet with a child from the foster care system here in VA. WE GET TO MEET a child that we have been praying about for 3 months. We started this process in September 2011. What a great ride it's been.
Step out in your faith today. The results will be magnificent!
God Bless Ya'll,