Thursday, August 21, 2014


more from "anything"
note: this is Cora's new "picture" face (she is not in pain)


  • When you walk with God and ask Him to use you, you start getting excited about little hiccups in everyday life. Interruptions become opportunities, failed plans become open doors.

  • Mary had no regard for the way her life would change and be impact by giving birth to Jesus. She saw that this was going to save generations of humans. She felt the eternal significance of her life and praised God that she got to be a part of his plan, part of his plan to redeem people.

  • I didn't need to be right so bad when I thought about God watching.  
Man. this book. is killing me. every week I read about 2-3 chapters and then study scripture daily...I have a highlighter out like a kid on the first day of college. this book is marked up and down and all around.

Mary saw she was going to have eternal significance. TRACY....get your head in the game. I have whined, cried, gnashed teeth, hulked know...incredible hulk stuff....and it took THIS long to get it!
I don't have to fix this kid. I don't even have to AGREE with her view of the world. I am here to provide love, safety, cool clothes and shampoo....(there is so much more but you all get it)

First of all. why has no one walked up and slapped the hell out of me. Some of you get within arms length of me...I know you have had a great opportunity to reach out and touch someone.

You see it's not about my family....doing something great. It's about doing kingdom work. Kingdom work is not hocus pocus, it's not being Mother Theresa! It's about shutting up and just doing it...because someday somewhere this child will have children, or they will have children and then hey, they might have children and somewhere somehow the seed of LOVE has been planted. the cycle of abuse has ceased. CEASED. A divine intervention.

Very similar to what happened to me when I stopped drinking. See. I STOPPED drinking. BAHAHAHAHAH . one time it took me 90 days to get 30 days sobriety. I have so many white chips that Cora could have a full poker set. GOD STOPPED ME FROM DRINKING. yes. I am hollering....sorry....let me bring this down a notch.

I have been trying to cover first , second and third all while stealing home. crazy talk. so crazy.

So I accept the hiccups. Yesterday was full of hiccups.
husband worked overtime
I did not want to get out of pj's
girls started scrapping at 7:20 am. (new record)
RSVP'd to small group
un RSVP'd from small group.
found out in home therapy was cancelled and quietly did the happy dance
explained to my daughter why I hate playing games in therapy (real board games) and she UNDERSTOOD! :)
did two daughter manicures.
cooked dinner and had 3 children at the table
performed 2 daughter pedicures
performed 2 daughter foot rubs
sent 2 daughters to bed after they refused to do my nails...j/k. they were tired.
performed doggy massage on Silas with essential oils.
went to bed. at midnight. happy.

So in the book she goes on to write about Mary. Then I will tell you how I have been acting
  • Mary never sought her own comfort
  • Tracy always wanted her comfortable life back!
  • She lived entitled to nothing
  • Tracy felt entitled to have everyone follow her rules and really got mad when someone ELSE acted entitled.
  • She expected suffering rather than being surprised by it.
  • Tracy seriously thought that two years of suffering was ENOUGH.
  • She waited and responded to God rather than trying to control any outcome
  • Tracy was impatient and only cried out to God when the poop was hitting the fan AND thought she could seriously control ANY outcome.
  • She received whatever the Lord had for her with joy.
  • I (since I am Tracy) refused any packages from the Lord that did NOT include Joy.      


Seriously , can you imagine living with me. I just told Bryan: hey people tell me that I inspire them...but when the kids wake up I lose all that stuff. :) that is my life. I don't mislead others as to the struggle I am going through daily. This is some tough stuff. Sometimes Bryan and I just look at each other and laugh. Other times I have imagined a cereal bowl (full of course) meeting with his forehead. ---

I read a great post last night in a FB chat for adoptive/foster parents.
Someone listed their children in age - 17, 13, and yeah...basically a number line....:)
another gal said : wow! you are busy!
the person answered quickly without missing a beat:
no, just called.

simple as that. We are called. Not just that woman. Not just Bryan and I . We are called to help widows and orphans, global and local. Stop and think. The church is failing. If each church in the US adopted just ONE child. Foster care would be empty. EVERY church. someone do the math. how many churches are in the US?
 According to the book Beyond Megachurch Myths, there were 320,000 Christian U.S. churches in 2007. Of these U.S. churches, 1,250 were megachurches with an average weekend attendance of 2,000 or more.
so here are some Foster Care statistics:

More than 250,000 children in the U.S. enter the foster care system every year. While more than half of these children will return to their parents, the remainder will stay in the system. Most of these children are living with foster families, but some also live in group facilities.
Find more info and see a little video of our family done earlier this year.

Each year more than 20,000 children age out of the foster care without being adopted. Today there are 104,000 children in foster care waiting to be adopted ranging in age from less than a year old to 21.
The race and ethnicity of children waiting to be adopted vary from State to State and City to City. However, the most recent adoption and foster care statistics from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families Adoption and Foster Care Analysis Reporting System shows the majority of children waiting to be adopted are Caucasian (40 percent) or African American (28 percent). Children of Hispanic origin account for 22 percent of those waiting to be adopted.

all info in Bold is found on this link.

I gotta run. Today someone is getting their braces put on! Say a little prayer for God to provide freedom from pain and anxiety for my girl.

thanks for letting me share,

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